Confessions of a "XX-chromosome" {girl}

I think I just had the shortest shift at work thus far. Here's how the day panned out:

Alarm goes at 7:45am, but I'm already up. Great sleep!
Decided outfit, got dressed.
Had a tasty breakfast - mmm so tasty.
Have time spare, research AusPost so I can pick up my parcel - not open till I'm at work. Dang.
Head to work. Arrive 0858.
See friend pull up at the same time. Debate about going round the front, but last time it was locked. Choose side entrance.
Thought to wait for friend [who has key], but think she might take too long.
Ring door bell - [note this is the disastrous move...]
Door answered by RN. Served a pretty big slamming about ringing the door bell when the front door was open. Noted.
Thought I was okay.
Nope, not okay. Need space. Decide where to go to clear my head and avoid people for a bit.
EN comes and talks to me and asks if I'm okay. Oh poo, a fountain is pouring down my face.
Why the heck am I crying? It can't be because I got a big telling off. EN looks teary... odd.
Figure I've got a few things on my mind, and the telling off just triggered a reaction.
Calm myself down.
Maintenance dude see's me hiding outside, that i've been crying, and this makes him cry. Naw...
Maintenance dude makes me laugh, I can handle the day.
Plan to wash my face before facing the resi's.
RN comes and talks to me after talking to the EN.
More bloody crying. What the heck!? I'm not even being poked and asked "Are you gonna cry"...
Calmed down, made a plan with RN. I can handle the day again...
Wash my face in the bathroom. Take a moment. I'm good.
Walk out of bathroom. CEO sees me and says hi.
I try and fob a "Oh you've caught me going somewhere - here's a side wave".
CEO asks how I am. I can't not face her now...
I said "I'm fine, its all good, I'll be okay... I'll talk to you later"
CEO says its not fair to the residents to see me looking like I do. Thanks, now you made me feel crap.
More bloody crying. CEO wants to know whats going on.
CEO tells me to come in to her office and talk.
I have no idea anymore.
CEO sends me home.
Arrived home 0947.

Pretty sure I'm not paid for that 40 minutes of sitting around at work crying. CRYING!? I hate being a chick sometimes, seriously, especially because I get a mega ugly face when I do that awkward cry. I have no idea whats going on. Is it possible that today I'm just really on edge and I was caught off guard this morning?? I had plenty of sleep. I had breakfast even. What - the - freak...

I think today can be known as D-day = Disaster day. Today I need mega big strength, Lord! I don't think I'm up for much... but it will be nice to be able to lounge in my PJ's...


Carlien said...

Oh Carola, I hope you got a big hug from someone by the end of that day.. and that you figured out a bit more what was at the root of it all.

There's a song which always rings in my head on days like that (which I have too!)..
it might be by Shane and Shane, and it goes:
Your Grace is sufficient for me, Your Strength is made perfect when I am weak;
All that I cling to I lay at your feet,
Your Grace is sufficient for me.

I have often had that on repeat in my head during the days when nothing else seems to make sense.

Bless you Carola!

Carola... said...

Thanks Carlien! That was a horrible day!! I faced work the following day - so, the Thursday - and most people heard by then about the day before, and it was nice to know that most people cared that I was doing ok. I even got a hug from the Maintenance guy because he wanted to make extra sure I was okay. It made for a pretty flat week energy wise, but I felt very centred in God by the end of it.

Topping off the week was spending a day/overnight with some of the gals & ladies from church. We got home this afternoon and I'm already feeling revived!

Thanks for the song suggestion, sweets! I'm going to go look that up! What a great song to have go through your head on a bad day!

Love you Govenders ALOT! Big hugs and greetings to the family! xxx